Currently, I have therapy once every other week. I feel that I need it this often as a part of my mental health care. But there are days when I just don’t have anything I need to talk about with her. I worry that she will one day tell me we don’t have to meet as often because of this. Or that she feels I am doing so well that we don’t have to meet as often. If or when that happens, I know I will have a surge of anxiety.
EVEN ON THE GOOD DAYS
The way I feel about therapy is that I want to keep going even on my good days when I have nothing to talk about because what if she tells me I only need to go once a month or every other month and in between that time something happens where I need to talk to her, then what will I do? Just thinking of this gives me a little bit of anxiety. This is why I prefer to keep going on a regular basis. Just in case I need her.
HAVING SET APPOINTMENTS
Having a set appointment for every other week gives me the piece of mind that if I struggle with something during the off days that she will be there to help me through it soon. On the good days, where I don’t have anything to share, we usually talk about my kids or something like that to pass the time and on days like that we cut the session short.
Right now because of Covid-19 we are meeting over the phone. As someone with social anxiety, I prefer this method over going into an office where I have to sit in a waiting area with strangers. Sitting in a waiting area that has other people in it gives me anxiety. It’s probably not the case, but I always feel like the other people are staring at me.
I also get uncomfortable in the therapist office if we have any amount of silence and because I have a problem with eye contact. It makes me uncomfortable. This is why I am liking the whole social distancing thing and having sessions over the phone. I don’t have to worry about waiting rooms, uncomfortable silences or making eye contact at all. Though if I think about it, these are all things that I should probably be working through with my therapist. I guess they are going on my list of topics for therapy.